David Trinko: Who needs a best friend?Just be friends

My 13 year old is now wrestling with a particular label. She can’t even determine who her best friend is, or even who her main group of friends is, which upsets her.

She is involved in a variety of activities and is easy to get acquainted with. She was born with a naturally friendly personality that people like to be around. With her, whether you’re 13 or a few generations older, you tend to smile and laugh.

She brings so much joy to many people when she is happy. That’s why it’s so hard to see her suffering when she’s alone. She feels pressured to label someone her “best friend.”

In popular culture, we are struck by the stories of our lifelong companions. There is a belief that any one companion from your childhood can be your soundboard for the rest of your life. And help you reconnect with your roots and help you to be the best version of your own.

I don’t want to see her feel so uneasy about whether she should feel more familiar with the crew, volleyball teammates, basketball teammates, or groups that seemed useful at the time, which she had for several years. is.

I haven’t helped her very much. Many friendships can be fleeting. I always have friends in elementary school, high school, university, workplace, etc. Many of them faded a little when we had no daily excuses to hang out.

My best friend in high school and I usually exchange Facebook messages once or twice a year. This isn’t the case for most people in their twenties, but they say how to get together because they live within 30 minutes of each other. And 30s. Whenever I return to Georgia, I reconnect for beer with my college colleagues who persuaded me to move there for several years. I still have lunch with my ex-colleague in the newspaper from time to time. At least once a year, I try to meet another close friend who currently lives in the Columbus area.

When I married my wife, the groom’s attendant was this all-star team of best friends from different stages of my life. Now my wife is my closest best friend.

Over the years, I have other constant friends who are enthusiastic about or fade back a little, depending on the season of our lives. But is it really important who you label as your best friend?

I was envious of my children from an early age, but now I’m watching them with my 7 year olds. We can go to parks and pools, and she will find another child of her age. They become fast friends, do everything together and explode. When we’re ready to go, I ask her the name of her new companion, and she usually forgets. Still, she knows it’s a friend, and when she meets them again, she reconnects with them.

We should all be lucky enough to make acquaintances and enjoy their company very easily.

That’s what I think when I hear anxiety about how to label my 13-year-old friend. Don’t worry about having a best friend. Worry about being good friends, and the rest will work out over time.

David Trinko is the Editor-in-Chief of The Lima News.To reach him with 567-242-0467,on mail Or on Twitter @Lima_Trinko..

David Trinko: Who needs a best friend?Just be friends

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